How to Lose a Wizard in 10 Days
by Angeline
Summary: Inspired by the heartbreak of her two friends, Lily Evans from Teen Witch magazine writes an article on 'How to Lose a Wizard in 10 Days'. Unfortunately, the guy she chooses must win a bet and make her fall in love with him. Who will succeed? LJ Review?
1. Heartbroken

**A/N**: Hi hi :) Another Lily/James from Yours Truly :D Okay, let's say they had computers back then and since Lily is a Muggle, she knows how to use one. Okay? This is just another story I feel like writing because I **_loved_** the movie! Heh heh, yes, I am _very_ happy today! bounce bounce I **_loved_** the movie and decided to write an L/J about it. Okay? End of story:) So do me a favor… and review. Flames, praise, criticism… I take it all.

**Disclaimer**: You know what is mine and what is JKR's.

Anyways, for those of you who are curious – removed my story. I do not know why… this is a repost and I renovated this chapter :) This story features a **lot** more about spells, wizarding stuff… y'know… Please Review!

**How to Lose a Wizard in 10 Days**

_Chapter One – Heartbroken_

"Oh, _Lily_!" Lana Andrews cried. She stuck her head into the office cubicle and turned to one of her associates. "I absolutely **worship** your new 'how-to' article!"

Lily Evans smiled. She pleased her boss, yet again… with another of her 'how-to' articles. Lily Evans had a vast interest, passion, and love for writing. She has several writing degrees from top colleges throughout England. Currently, she was writing for England's fastest-growing teen magazine, _Teen Witch_. She could only write about what girls wanted to know… nail polish, fashion, and advice on relationships. She wanted to write about things that _really_ mattered to the world… politics, nature, and world issues. But Lana wouldn't let her write about this. Why would young, teen witches be interested in these kind of things? Lily was trying to please Lana as best as she could; to write a article that would just blow her away… maybe, then, she'd write about what she wants.

"I'm glad you like it, Lana," Lily replied politely, smoothing out her cream colored skirt and tucking one of her fiery-red locks behind her ear.

Lana smiled and all the creases on her dilapidated, pale face showed. "I can't wait for your next article," She replied excitedly. "I'll see you girls later!" She rushed off, humming a country tune.

Arabella Figg glared fakely at Lily. "Sometimes, I really don't know what she sees in you…"

Lily sighed and laughed. "What's there not to love about me?"

"Well, first of all – you have the weirdest obsession with Quidditch. You talk too loud, giggle too high, too pretty for your own good, a kick ass writer…"

Lily smiled. "Thanks… where's Katie?"

"Bathroom, I guess," Arabella shrugged, reading over her article.

"I haven't seen her all morning…" Lily replied, unsure.

"That's because she's in the _bathroom_," Arabella exclaimed.

"Ew, what is she doing in there!" Lily giggled.

"Oh, god, you pervert…" Arabella rolled her eyes and shook her head. "Seriously… I worry about you sometimes."

Lily snorted while she laughed, just to freak Arabella out a little. It felt more normal when Arabella lectured Lily about her 'unladylike behavior' and 'What would Lana think!' Lily just stared and snorted more.

Katie Peters approached her office cubicle, her eyes red with tears.

As soon as Lily saw her come within reach of their cubicle, she stopped snorting and looked at Katie. "Oh, no… hon, are you okay?"

Katie sniffed a little and her eyes were still moist. "I'm okay."

"What happened?" Arabella asked, giving Katie a hug. "I thought everything was going okay with Frank!"

"I thought it was, too!" Katie burst out, tears falling down her flushed cheeks. Her ocean blue eyes were red, her lovely blonde hair was a total mess, and her face was flushed. "It was going **_so_** well, and then he dumps me!" She wailed even more while Lily and Arabella panicked. They put a silencing charm on her before Lana could come over and ask what happened.

"I'll undo the spell if you won't cry," Arabella said. "It's for your own good."

Katie bit her lip and nodded while Arabella muttered the counter spell. "So what happened the last few days?" Arabella asked, putting her wand away.

"I don't know," Katie replied miserably. "You know one of those Locator devices? Where you have to think reallyhard about that person and say their name and then automatically they show up on the screen?"

"Yeah…" Lily said, rubbing her chin. "Those are pretty cool. You get to see exactly what they're doing."

"Yeah," Katie said, bursting into tears again, almost. "I bought one of those, the Locator 3000, and I used to keep in touch with Frank. Once I used it and he was in the shower." Katie smiled, rejoicing the memory.

Arabella chuckled. "Wasn't he surprised?"

"Hell yeah," Katie replied. "He almost screamed. But it's not like I've not seen him naked before."

"You guys had sex?" Lily asked. "After how long?"

"5 days and yes," Katie replied proudly. "It was so… beautiful. I just… cried."

Arabella and Lily shot Katie a strange glance. "You cried?" They asked flatly.

"Yes," Katie replied her eyes damp again. "I really loved him."

"You've known a guy for a week, and you tell him you love him?" Arabella asked. "Doesn't that sort of chase him away…?"

"I don't know," Katie said, throwing her hands up in defeat. "I just wanted him to know my feelings!"

"What did he say?" Lily asked.

"I don't know…" Katie replied miserably. "He just mumbled a few words about dinner…"

"Listen to me," Lily said, holding Katie's hands in a firm grip. "Frank is a loser. Frank is a wimp. In fact, Frank Longbottom could rot in hell for all I care! He is a dumbass for dumping someone as wonderful, gorgeous, talented, and loving as you are. If you ask me – I say it was _his_ loss, not yours."

"Totally," Arabella nodded in agreement.

Katie sighed and looked very relieved. "Thanks," She said, pulling each of them in a tight embrace. "You guys are seriously, the best."

Lily and Arabella smiled.

"Okay, now get to working on your article before Lana appears and asks you what has happened!" Lily said, giving Katie a pat on the back.

Katie muttered a spell to make her red eyes go away and her red face too and she turned to her computer and started to slowly type…

- - - -

James Potter grinned, winning another game of pool. Even thought it was a Muggle game, his associates and best friends, Sirius Black (who was a half blood and introduced him to the game) and Remus Lupin were rather fond of it.

"Another round," James asked brightly, collecting the piles of galleons, sickles, and knuts.

"You must be kidding me," Remus replied flatly. "That's the 5th game you've won in a row."

"And your point is?" James asked, jingling all his winnings.

Sirius pulled out his pockets and nothing was in them. "We're fucking broke now," He replied.

James pouted. "Fine, be that way!"

"Hey," Remus said, looking offended. "That might work on the ladies, but not on us…"

James sniggered. "Oh, so you're _not_ gay?"

"Damn right," Sirius said, rubbing his temples. "Can you believe Chris is giving the account to Jessica and Carolyn?"

"What the hell!" James exclaimed, squeezing his fists. "Again?"

"I know," Remus said dejectedly. "Seems he only gives accounts to the long legged, tight clothes wearing type… not the ones who watch Quidditch and drink beer all the time type…"

"Moony," James said, looking offended. "You make us sound like we're… _lazy_ or something.""

"That's because we **are** James," Sirius pointed out.

"Speak for yourself," James replied curtly and smiling. "I am James Harry Potter. Ultimately charming, good looks, sexy hair, great body, nice ass, loaded, and ladies man, oh yeaah…"

Remus and Sirius stared flatly at James.

"What mirror are YOU looking in?" Remus retorted while breaking into peals of laughter.

"That one," James pointed innocently to a nearby mirror.

Sirius grinned. "_Anyways_… how're we going to deal with this situation?"

"I dunno," Remus replied. "It's not like we can dress in dark clothes, maul Chris, and tell him to give his three male associates the diamond account."

"Moony!" Sirius said, shocked. "I never knew you'd suggest _mauling_ someone! That is absolutely horrific!"

Remus shrugged. "It's not like I mean it. I was being sarcastic. Really, Sirius, darling, you take everything too seriously. _Sense the tone_. Besides, I'd like to see some other people handing the accounts; it doesn't have to be **us**, but at least someone besides Jessica and Carolyn to handle everything. It's always them, never us, never anyone else."

"Yeah, let's go shave our legs, buy some tight shirts and pants, get manicures and pedicures, and do our hair," Sirius joked. "Maybe then Chris'll choose us."

"Ew, imagine Sirius in a bra," James said, looking in deep thought. He shuddered. Remus and James burst out laughing while Sirius looked insulted.

"I think I'd look good in a bra," Sirius replied, puffing his chest out. "Highlights my sexy pecs."

"What mirror are _you_ looking in, Padfoot?" James retorted, still laughing.

"The invisible one," Sirius said, flexing his muscles.

"Oh… no wonder," James replied.

"Anyways," Remus said, finally ending his laugh. "What about the account?"

"Well," Sirius said thoughtfully. "I think we have to persuade him."

"Just by talking," James asked flatly. "Wow, great plan. We have a better chance of him agreeing if we flash him."

"Argue passionately, I mean," Sirius said, looking for something to eat.

"Arguing passionately… arguing passionately…" James repeated to himself. "Will that work?"

"Don't know, never tried," Sirius said monotonously, still looking.

"Well, there's a first time for everything…" Remus said, glancing at James. Sirius found a sandwich and also glanced at James.

"What? You want me to ask Chris?" James asked.

"Yeah, because if he says no, it'll be worth all the money I lost," Sirius grinned.

"And plus, you're persuasive," Remus added.

James looked quite chuffed and said, "Okay, I'll do it."


	2. Even More Heartbreak

**How to Lose a Wizard in 10 Days**

_Chapter Two – Even More Heartbreak_

The day was over and the skies grew murky and dim-lit. Lily was a bit tired, stifling her yawns, but still in a cheerful mood. She was still working in the office, coming up with new ideas for her next 'how-to' article. She realized that hunger enveloped her when her stomach began to grumble lightly.

"Hey, what's on the menu for tonight?" Lily asked. "Italian? Chinese?"

"Out to eat again?" Arabella asked.

"Of course," Lily replied, as if it was obvious. "Do you want me to cook?"

"Good heavens, no!" Arabella exclaimed, laughing. "You cooking is like the Devil baking petite French-baked delicacies like madelines."

"Thanks, Bella," Lily snorted. "That certainly boosts up my confidence for cooking."

"You are very welcome."

Katie sulked. "I'm not going to eat."

"Why not?" Lily asked.

"I'm too fat," Katie replied gloomily. "That's why Frank dumped me, of course."

"You're **not **fat!" Lily and Arabella exclaimed.

"Yeah right," Katie muttered, playing with the ends of her blouse.

"Anyways, _Amos_ has asked me to dinner tonight," Arabella replied cheerfully, checking her reflection in the mirror and applying some make up. "So - sorry girls! Maybe tomorrow night!"

Lily sighed and buried her head in her hands. "Argh…" She said. "To think, _Teen Witch _is such a successful magazine and I don't even have **one person** to have dinner with tonight. This is pathetically sad."

Arabella looked away from her compact make up and grinned at Lily. "Oh, come on. You'll find a boyfriend!" She said, giving Lily a wink.

"I don't need or want one," Lily stated. "Men are just so… time consuming and _boring_."

Arabella looked shocked. "No they're not!"

"Yes they are," Lily said. "You have to call them, go out to dinner with them, be seen with them, watch the sports _they_ want…" Lily rubbed her temples. "I just find that… time consuming."

"Well, yes, but, you don't have to do those things," Arabella protested, applying her lipstick.

"Then, they dump you," Lily said, flatly. "And they have a jolly good old time bragging about how he just shagged you last night to their friends and how joyful it was to them. They're just a waste of time, and I don't need one."

"Well, actually, you do…" Arabella said, closing her compact mirror shut and giving Lily a smile. "If you want children."

"I know," Lily said, smoothing out her skirt again. "But I heard giving birth hurts ever so much… so, I might adopt. There are so many orphans in those orphanages… those lonely, poor, little things…"

Katie sniffed and said, "Frank wanted to adopt children too!" Arabella took the hint and quickly said good-bye and Apparated away.

Lily sighed. "So, Katie… I guess it's just you and me tonight."

"I told you," Katie replied flatly. "I'm not hungry." And with that, Katie grabbed her bag, and Apparated away. Probably to their flat.

Lily sighed in an aggravated tone. Fucking men, they always take her friends away. One friend had ditched her for a boyfriend, and another of her friends had just ditched her because she wasn't hungry. Lily grabbed her purse and left the office, locking everything up. Looks like another night at Diagon Alley…

Lily woke up the next morning, totally trashed. Last night, at Diagon Alley, Lily drank so much that she basically lost count after the 7th drink. She had no idea how she got home and she felt so tired and cramped.

"Uughaudff…" Lily moaned as she tried to get up from her bed. She couldn't get up. Lily tried again but her body just wouldn't respond. Lily had been through this before, countless of times. She rolled off her bed and tried doing a pushup. When she went up, she pushed her knee forward, and slowly got up, smiling at her little 'maneuver'. She slowly dragged her feet to the bathroom and almost collapsed on her sink.

Arabella walked in, wearing a tank and shorts. Once she saw sight of Lily, trying to paw at her toothbrush, Arabella looked shocked. "Lily! What the fuck happened to you!"

"Diagon Alley… too much beer…" Lily muttered, trying to get her toothbrush. After several attempts, she stopped. The toothbrush looked like it was flying around the room, like a snitch, except her toothbrush was a dull green color.

Arabella massaged her forehead. "How many times do I have to tell you!" Arabella asked impatiently. "Don't go drinking! Look what you've done to yourself. You can barely **walk**, let alone say your name."

"I remembered my maneuver though," Lily murmured proudly. She would have liked to stand up straight and said it to Arabella's face, but she couldn't. Her brain was saying move, but her body was ignoring her brain.

"That's about all you **can** remember," Arabella muttered. "Gosh, you're lucky it's a Saturday. You better stay home today." Arabella dragged Lily back to her bed, and pulled the covers over her. "Now, you stay here and take a nap. If you need anything, just holler."

Lily grinned. "Okay, Mom," She teased Arabella, while falling fast asleep.

Arabella sighed. Lily was drunk a lot, lately. She didn't know anything that was wrong with her though. Her family was good, except for that tub-of-lard sister she has, Petunia. Yuck. Arabella shuddered at the thought of Petunia. Lily wasn't heartbroken, her family was good (except for Petunia), and she had a good job… so what was the problem? Arabella sighed again. Maybe Lily liked to drink, just for fun…

There was a knock on the apartment door, interrupting Arabella's thoughts. She got up and walked to the apartment door. It was Amos. His amazing dark brown hair was in perfect condition and his gray eyes were absolutely lovely. He had a serious expression on his face but greeted Arabella with a kiss.

"I really loved last night," Arabella replied, closing the door, as Amos came in.

"Me too," Amos said. "I was rather fond of it, too…"

Arabella giggled and replied, "So what brings you here?"

Amos held her hand in his. "Well, you know how I **love** Quidditch, right?"

Arabella replied, "Yeah…"

Amos looked down guiltily, and it worried Arabella a bit. "Well, they've offered me a spot on the Chudley Cannons team. Manager's assistant. The pay is awesome and I get to travel around the world _and_ watch their Quidditch games for free!"

Arabella's eyes looked shocked and amazed. "Amos, oh my god, that's absolutely wonderful!"

Amos looked to the side, and replied in his gentlest tone. "Bell, this means… that there won't be an 'us' anymore… since I have to travel so much and everything. I hope you understand… this job… it means everything to me…"

"Oh," Arabella replied softly. It was about all she could say. Her eyes clouded with tears, as the feeling of being dumped sunk in. She realized that Amos thought Quidditch was more important than her. How could he? That bastard! "So, Quidditch is more important that your girlfriend? Is that how it is? I thought you were caring, Amos! I really thought you were! I thought this time it'd be different from my past relationships – but I see it's all the same." Arabella said in a raspy voice, trying to stop the tears from cascading down her cheeks.

"Arabella, you know I don't," Amos said, grabbing her hand before Arabella could run out. "It's just… I've been waiting for this my whole life. I thought you'd understand." He got up and cupped Arabella's face. "I'll still love you."

Arabella shrugged out of his grasp and went to the door. She opened it and pointed outside. "Out," She commanded.

"But -" Amos protested.

"OUT!" Arabella screamed.

Amos looked a bit frightened, but scampered out quickly and left.

Arabella slammed the door and locked it. She'd never date again. She thought she'd found the perfect one, but apparently she was wrong. She collapsed in a withering heap on her couch and started bawling and didn't for quite a while.

Lily finally awoke from her slumber. She got up sleepily, and miraculously, this time, she didn't need to try 'the manuver'. She felt quite stoked, she could actually get up on her own after who knows how many cups of alcoholic liquor. She looked at her enchanted clock and realized it was about 2 in the afternoon.

"Bella!" She yelled. No answer. "ARABELLA FIGG!" Still no answer. Lily sighed. Whatever happened to 'If you need anything, just holler'…? Lily got out of her bed and started to walk to the living room. Amazingly, she made it. When she got there, she saw Arabella in a crumpled heap, sobbing like there was no tomorrow. Lily immediately rushed to her side and started asking what was wrong.

"Bell… what's wrong?" Lily asked. "What happened?"

"Amos," Arabella sobbed. "He came by…"

"And…?" Lily asked.

Arabella wiped her tears and cleared her face. She muttered a charm that made her red eyes and flushed cheeks go away. "He broke up with me," She said finally.

"Oh," Lily said. She gave Arabella a reassuring hug. "Don't worry, he'll come around later."

"No, he won't," Arabella replied, pulling out of the hug. "He's been accepted as the Chudley Cannon's assistant manager. He's going to travel the world… without me."

"Oh, really!" Lily asked her eyes brightening. "Maybe he could get us free tickets!"

Arabella glared. "It's not the time to ask for free tickets, Lil. I screamed at him to get out of her flat."

Lily laughed. "You screamed at him!" Lily asked, in shock. "Poor guy… Sorry! I just find this funny!" Lily dodged Arabella's glare.

"It's not," Arabella said crossly.

"Well," Lily said, putting an arm around Arabella. "A couple of years from now when he meets someone he falls in love with and gets fired from that damn Quidditch job. She going to ask him about his ex-girlfriends… and when he mentions you, he's going to realize what big of a dumbass he was for dumping you."

Arabella smiled and patted Lily. "Thanks so much," She said, grinning at last. "I'm so lucky to have a friend like you."

Lily just smiled back and gave Arabella a reassuring hug. "You're welcome."

Arabella sighed and finally said, "At least I'll have something to talk about with Katie, now." She said, chuckling.

**A/N**: Chapter 2 is finished. :) I hope you all enjoyed it. I'm sorry for not putting any of James, Sirius, or Remus in here, but they definitely will be making another appearance in the next chapter :) Poor Arabella and Katie! Like Arabella said, they'll have something to talk about now, lol.

Love Always, Angeline


	3. Failure and Light bulbs

**How To Lose a Wizard in 10 Days**

_Chapter Three – Failure and Light bulbs_

Lily sighed and buried her head into her arms in defeat. She had tried everything she could think of to at least **try** and cheer Arabella and Katie up, but nothing she thought of worked. She took them out to eat fine foods (Well, if you count the Leaky Cauldron as fine food… it's the thought that really counts!), she got them both manicures and pedicures, she brought them to the movies, and she even brought them shopping! Even _shopping_ didn't make them feel better! What else could Lily do? Her wallet was getting lighter and lighter as the day went on. She sighed. The measures she took to ensure her best friends' happiness. She was truly a goddess.

She did this all in one night, and the next morning, Lily was beat. Lily banged her head on the table several times, wondering where she went wrong. Lily was just about to raise her head, to wake up Arabella and Katie, and get ready for another day at _Teen Witch_ offices.

"Lily?" A timid voice said from the corner.

Lily's head shot up and immediately answered, "Katie?"

"And Arabella," Another soft voice interjected. Arabella and Katie walked in, with small smiles on their tear-streaked faces.

"We just wanted to say," Arabella began.

"That thanks for trying to cheer us up," Katie finished, grinning.

"Yeah," Arabella said. "We have an awesome friend."

Lily smiled. "You just noticed that? Pfft."

"Oh, well sor-**ree**!" Arabella exclaimed.

"I guess it's our fault that we got dumped," Katie said, a bit of sadness showing up in her voice.

"Why do girls always think that?" Lily said. "It's not really your fault! Frank is just an arse! A very big one!"

"But so cute…" Katie replied dreamily. "And it was my fault that I got dumped."

"You're just like everyone!" Lily exclaimed, slamming her fist on the table. "It's not your fault, Katie! You're perfect and your ex-boyfriend was being an asshole! How can I ever convince people like you that it's not their fault that their boyfriend dumped them? It's not because of your weight, looks, or anything! WHAT CAN I DO!"

"Jeez," Arabella said, taking an apple and biting into it. "Write an article about it, or something. Just shut your mouth!"

Lily looked inspired. "You know, Bell, that's a great idea! I should write an article on how it has nothing to doe with the girl's outer appearance that loses the guy – it's all about the actions!"

Arabella glared. "So you're saying Frank dumped me because I annoyed him?"

"Well," Lily said, stuttering a bit. "In a g-good way… It's not really your fault though. I mean, many women make the same mistakes you make. It's pretty common." Lily added quickly.

Arabella's face tensed to a slight smile. "So, you must thank me, the great one… for giving you this prestigious idea," Arabella said, bowing slightly. "And Katie, too, of course. We both got dumped."

Lily laughed and clapped her hands. "Of course, the story will be focused on you two!"

"Hell no!" Katie exclaimed.

Lily and Arabella were surprised from this sudden outburst.

"Yeah, don't," Arabella said, shaking her head. "It's already embarrassing enough to have been dumped and moping around for a few days."

Lily grinned. "Okay, I won't use your lives for my article. But I have to check with Lana about it first… Come on, let's get ready for work."

- - - -

The motorcycle's engine revved up, but slowly died down. Sirius was standing next to his 'wonderful masterpiece'. He groaned and sighed a long sigh.

"You think I'd get paid for my failures…" He muttered. "I'd be a damn billionaire."

"Sirius, how's the motorcycle going?" Remus asked lightly, holding a beer.

"Not good," Sirius said, stretching and scratching the nape of his neck. "The engine won't work… I revved it up and everything, but all of a sudden, it just… died."

"Ah," Remus observed. "Did you change the oil? Maybe it's out of gas."

"Didn't you change the gas?" Sirius asked. "Like… last week?"

"No," Remus replied. "You never told me to."

Sirius smacked his head and groaned again. "Moony, we're such **idiots**! No wonder this damn thing won't work! NO GAS!" Sirius danced around like a crazed maniac. "My motorcycle works!" He sang over and over.

Remus chuckled and advised, "You better hurry up and go change it."

"Yeah, you're right. I _so_ have to surprise Jamesie!" Sirius said, clapping his hands in glee. "He'll be sooo happy!"

Remus rolled his eyes and patted Sirius on the back. "Sure he will. He'll be absolutely peachy happy about it," Remus said.

"Yay!" Sirius exclaimed. "I can't wait!"

"Anyways," Remus replied. "James just beeped me up on the Locator and he said he's got this wonderful presentation prepared for tonight to show Chris and the girls."

Sirius glanced at Remus. "Think it really is?"

Remus sighed. "We have to hope for the best, don't we? James is our only hope if we ever want to handle a 'large' customer."

Sirius sighed. "He's not going to make it, huh?"

Remus glanced back. "Doesn't look like it."

- - - -

Lily applied her make up in a rush. She was almost late. She was supposed to arrive at 9:00 and right now it was 9:52. Katie and Arabella had already left because they got a head start on dressing. Lily sighed and tilted her head to the side. She had decided on a white blouse and a fiery-red skirt… just to match her hair. She applied some red on her eyelids and some gloss on her lips. She grabbed her bag and apparated out to _Teen Witch_ offices.

_Pop!_ Lily arrived, barely making it. She rushed to the secretary and checked it.

"Just in time, Lily," Heather said, grinning slightly. Heather McRay was the secretary for their business.

Lily grinned back, out of breath. "Thanks!" Lily said.

"No problem," Heather replied. "Best you get to your office quickly, I think Lana is in a bad mood today."

"Yikes," Lily said back, quickly rushing to her cubicle. As soon as she got there, Lily was on a roll! First, she was actually not late for once, and got to her office on time. Lily booted up her computer and turned around, looking for Arabella and Katie. They shared the same cubicle.

"We were wondering when you'd show up," Arabella said, grinning.

Katie smiled. "Oh, finally, you're here and not late. This is a serious miracle!"

"Oh, hush, now," Lily said, smiling. "Don't tease me, I know you're all jealous."

"Jealous of you," Arabella scoffed. "Oh _please_."

Lily smiled. She had really done her work well, hadn't she? Her best friends and coworkers are finally feelings themselves and not depressing or moping around. Lily sat down and relaxed. Everything was going her way… Well, she had to ask Lana about the article, of course.

"Oh, Lily!" A voice said, interrupting Lily's thoughts. It was Lana. Her black hair was pulled back in a bun and she was wearing a tradition Japanese kimono. She even had chopsticks sticking through her bun.

"Very nice ensemble," Lily commented, smiling.

"Very nice," Katie and Arabella echoed.

"Oh, thank you, girls!" Lana exclaimed gaily. She turned to Lily. "I've been loving your work, but the deadline for your next article's about 2 weeks. Any ideas for your next how to?"

Lily cleared her throat. This was it – the time to present her idea to Lana. "Yes, I've gotten a lovely idea," Lily said.

"Oh, really?" Lana replied, looking excited. "What is it?"

"Well," Lily started. "It all started out when Katie got dumped and then Arabella."

"Oh," Lana said. "I'm sorry to hear that."

"Yeah, but both of them, they were complaining that they were fat and ugly, and that was the reason they got dumped," Lily said. "Just like many of our readers. I mean, look! They're great women… they're just not very good handing at relationships. Just like our readers."

"Ah," Lana said, pursing her lips. "A dating how to."

"Yes, so I was thinking I could write an article about the typical mistakes females do to get the opposite sex," Lily said, proving her point, and beamed proudly.

"How are you going to write it?" Lana asked.

Lily was stumped. She didn't think of **how** to write the article. "With my computer…?" Lily laughed.

"No, I mean, are you going to really date a guy and lose him or just use Katie and Arabella's personal life?" Lana asked.

"No!" Lily said quickly.

"I think you should date a guy, and slowly lose him!" Lana said, her eyes twinkling. "They say the best article comes from experience."

Lily thought about it. She really didn't need a boyfriend or a "man" in her life… but this'd make a great article and maybe a bonus in her paycheck. "Sure, Lana," Lily grinned. "I'll start on it right away."

"How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days…" Lana said, fantasizing about the title. "Wonderful, I'm already loving it."

Lily smiled. "I'm glad I can please you."

"That's my girl," Lana said. "Now, come, I want you to meet two executives from an advertising company that we're going to help them advertise in our magazine. You may leave work after that to find the 'lucky guy', Lily."

Lily smiled and grabbed her bag, Katie and Arabella did the same.

"Thank you," Arabella mouthed. Katie nodded. Lily stuck her tongue out. Maybe she should've used their personal life for an article… Nah.

Lily followed Lana's step into the main hallway and saw two neat dressed women waiting for them, chatting with Heather.

"Girls!" Lana called out.

The two women turned around and smiled.

One of them stuck out her hand and said, "Carolyn Green and that's Jessica Spears. We're here on advertising business."

"Oh, welcome ladies! This is Arabella Figg, Fashion and Trends," Lana said, motioning to Arabella. "Katie Sanders, Fitness and Health." She motioned to Katie. "And Lily Evans, our 'How To' girl." She pointed to Lily.

"Oh, I've seen your column, Lily," Jessica replied. "It's really great. What are you working on now?"

"Oh, I'm wor-" Lily said.

"How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days," Lana interrupted, smiling at the title. "She's actually going to start dating a guy and then drive him away in a week and a half."

Jessica and Carolyn laughed.

"Poor guy," Jessica commented. Carolyn nodded and chuckled in agreement.

"Schooch!" Lana said. "Go off and find the lucky guy!"

Lily smiled and left with Arabella and Katie.

"Where are we going?" Arabella asked.

"Home," Lily said. "I gotta take a bath."

"But what about the article?" Katie asked.

Lily laughed. "There's plenty of time for that. The Leaky Cauldron, tonight."

- - - -

James straightened up his robes, ran his fingers through his hair nervously, and tugged at his ear. This was a 'good luck' ritual that he had performed every time he had to get up in public to make a speech or something. James took a few deep breaths… Inhale… Exhale… Inhale… Exhale. He was in front of The Leaky Cauldron, waiting for Chris, Jessica, and Carolyn.

Carolyn and Jessica both walked into the room, wearing the sexiest and most revealing clothes they owned.

"You… wanted to see us?" Carolyn asked.

"Yes," Chris replied. "James wants to ask us something."

"Oh, really?" Jessica said, arching an eyebrow.

"What is it?" Carolyn asked sharply. "We're in a meeting."

"Well," James said, glaring slightly. "Ladies, I've took my time and my effort to make a presentation for all of you."

Jessica snorted while Carolyn yawned.

"Ladies, let James make his point," Chris said and turned to James. "Continue."

"I think I should be in charge of this Delaure account."

"What?" Jessica exclaimed. "No way."

"Ditto," Carolyn said, looking flushed.

"Ladies!" Chris said, holding up his hands. "Let James make his point!"

"Yes, thank you Chris," James looked at Jessica and Carolyn menacingly. "Anyways, it's always Jessica and Carolyn that get to handle the major accounts. I know I'm head of the Quidditch and Sports department, but I'd like a chance to prove myself too. I'll do anything you want, to put it bluntly."

"I like my workers to have courage," Chris said, stroking his chin. "But what can you offer us, James? I know you're good at selling Quidditch, but these girls are good at selling anything."

"I'm not just only good at selling Quidditch," James replied. "You've just never given me the chance to do anything. I have the courage and bravery to go to farther limits… do anything!"

"Do anything?" Chris asked.

"Yes," James said. "I love diamonds… and I love women. What has women got to do with all of this? Well, it's usually the women who want the man to get them the diamond. Usually, that's the case. And I can get the man **and **the woman to fall in love with diamonds."

"So you're saying that you can make women fall in love with you or the diamonds?" Jessica asked.

"Both," James replied simply. "I'm just your average ladies man."

"Cocky and courageous," Chris noted. "I like."

"Not cocky," James said. "Confident."

Chris nodded. "So make a woman fall in love with you, James?"

James shrugged. "Sure, why not?"

"Okay, we'll pick someone," Jessica said.

"Right now, right here, in the Leaky Cauldron," Carolyn grinned.

James grimaced but smiled fakely. He raised an eyebrow. "Bring it on, girls."

"James, it's already been _brought_."

Author's Note: Sorry, but I could not help but NOT add that last line. Haha.

Love Always, Angeline


	4. The Meeting

**How to Lose a Wizard in 10 Days**

_Chapter Four – The Meeting_

Following Lana's orders, Lily and her friends obediently arrived at the Leaky Cauldron in the evening, trying to test their look on finding a poor fellow for Lily to write her article on. They went in and Lily grinned at Tom.

"The usual?" Tom asked, raising his eyebrow. 'The Usual' for Lily hadn't changed ever since the days she graduated.

"Yes, please," Lily replied.

"I'll just have water," Arabella replied.

"Me too, but with a cherry," Katie added.

Tom nodded and went off to get their drinks.

"Hrm…" Katie mused. "Maybe you should start looking now. I see a lot of fine guys in here."

"That's the last thing I need," Lily said. "Is a hot guy that I'm supposed to drive away in 10 days?"

"Oh yeah," Katie said. "But it'll make the article more believable."

"True, true," Arabella agreed.

Tom came back and handed them their drinks. "Have fun tonight, girls," He said, winking at them as if he knew what they were up to.

Lily, Arabella, and Katie walked away slowly, thanking Tom.

"Geeze," Arabella said. "That was weird."

"Too weird," Katie added, eating her cherry. "Mm, this is good."

"My butterbeer tastes a hell of a lot better!"

"Does not."

"Does too."

"Does not."

"Does too."

"Does _not_."

"Does _too_."

"Does **_not_**."

"Does** _too_**."

"DOES NOT!."

"DOES TOO!"

"STOP!" Arabella cried, coming in between Katie and Lily. "Geeze, I swear you two sometimes act like you're a toddler."

"I think that was the first time you commented me ever since I met you," Lily said sarcastically, sipping her butterbeer and looking pleased.

"Don't get used to it, hon," Arabella warned, laughter shining through her eyes.

"I still think water is better," Katie sighed, drinking her water.

"No way," Lily replied, getting into it again. She could have the most weirdest arguments over the stupidest things. Oh well.

"Anyways," Arabella interrupted. "Shouldn't you be finding that unfortunate bloke you promised Lana?"

"Yeah," Lily sighed. "I suppose you're right. I haven't … well, dated since Hogwarts, and I don't know if I'm ready." Lily shifted uneasily.

"Oh, come on, Lils!" Arabella said, patting her on the back. "I know you can do this. Go muster up some of that sexiness you stored away in a bottle!"

Lily laughed. "I wish."

"Just try your best," Katie said. "What have you got to lose?"

"My dignity and pride," Lily said, still not convinced. "Maybe we should do this tomorrow. At a better time."

"No, we're going to do it now," Arabella said firmly. "And that's that." Arabella pushed Lily into the crowd of faces and disappeared with Katie.

"Great friends I have," Lily mumbled to herself and sighed. She straightened herself up, getting ready to flirt.

Lily sighed. Getting a guy was well… tough! The first guy she flirted with was married, the second one did drugs, and the third one was… ok, let's not talk about the third one. She got a glass of vodka and started drinking. 'Maybe this'll help…' She thought dejectedly. She had to find a man by tonight. Well, maybe tomorrow… She felt a rough hand touch her shoulder, reading to snap at the person who dared bother her. Lily turned around and saw herself face-to-face with a man about a foot taller than her, broad shoulders, a nice smile, chocolate brown eyes, thin black-framed glasses, and his hair… all the angry feelings disappeared. That hair! Lily just wanted to go crazy with it!

"Excuse me, Miss," The man said. "What's your name?"

"Lily Evans," She said, holding out her hand. The mystery man took it and kissed her while murmuring, "James Potter."

Lily nodded. "Are you single?" She blurted out. Ugh. Mistake Number One. Wait, this was good! She made a mental thought. Her first mistake!

James nodded. "You?"

Lily nodded too.

'Damn, this conversation is boring…' James thought. 'Better ask her out.'

"Hungry?"

"Starving."

"Leaving."

"Now?"

James nodded.

Lily smiled. "Hold on…"

"Meet you out front," James replied.

"Guys!" Lily said excitedly. "I think I found a guy!"

"Ooh, where?" Katie asked excitedly.

"He's outside the door, but I don't know if you can see him well," Lily said.

"Cute," Arabella observed. "Ask him if he has any brothers."

Lily winked. "I don't think we'll have a lot of time for asking, if you know what I mean…"

"You slut!" Katie exclaimed through her chuckles. "Okay, shoo!"

Lily grinned. The Perfect Article… it was already on its way. On her way to the door, Lily reached for her little satin bag and pulled out a paper and a mini quill.

_First Mistake: Asking for Marital Status right after I met him_

Lily stuffed everything inside her back and strolled to the door.

James opened it for her and Lily stepped out of the restaurant, shivering a little. James asked, "Are you cold?"

Lily nodded slightly.

James grinned. "No problem," He replied. "I can fix it." He got out his wand and tapped it to Lily's shoulder. "_Calado_." He muttered, doing a swish-and-flick technique. Lily's shoulder turned green while she laughed.

She dug through her purse until she got out her wand. "I believe," She replied sinisterly. "It's _Caldo_." Warmth from the tip of her wand spread through all of Lily's body. She felt better immediately and sighed in pleasure.

James blushed. "Sorry, I'm not very good with Charms…" He replied. "I'm better at Transfiguration though!" He said brightening.

"Really?" Lily asked. "Transfiguration is my **_worst_** subject. And in Charms – well, I have a degree in that. Plus, my other writing degrees."

"Wow…" James said. "So are you a Charms professor?"

"No," Lily said. "I'm quite the opposite."

"And what would that be?" James grinned. "Stripper?"

Lily chuckled. "You wish. I'm a journalist. For _Teen Witch_ magazine. Are _you_ a stripper?"

James sighed. "This may surprise you, but… no, I am not a stripper."

Lily pouted and ran her fingers over his chest. "We could've had so much fun together if you were!"

"Well, we can always _pretend_…" James winked.

Lily laughed and looked at him. "You're pretty funny," She said.

"You are too," James replied. "Since we are both oh-so-starving, I better get my broom. _Accio Cleansweep_!" James yelled, putting his wand up. James' brand new Cleansweep came zooming through the air a few seconds later.

"Nice ride," Lily commented, nodding her approval. "Mine's better. Looks more new because it's polished."

"Oh, really?" James asked, arching an eyebrow. "What would a glamorous lady like you be riding a broom for?"

"To play Quidditch, duh," Lily replied obviously. "I try to get my friends and play, but they think it's boring and would rather have another day at the shopping centerl."

"Ah, so you're a tomboy?" James said, grinning. "I like that."

"Not so much of a **tomboy**…" Lily interjected. "More like… a girl who likes, wait no, loves Quidditch."

"That's great," James smiled. "Because I like, wait no, love Quidditch too." He said, imitating Lily's mistake.

"Isn't this a peachy start?" Lily asked, looking into his eyes. She broke away the gaze by questioning, "So where are we going?"

"Anywhere you want," James said.

"Wow, even the shopping center?" Lily teased.

"Okay, maybe not the mall," James groaned. "Something … entertaining."

"I don't know," Lily mused. "All I ever do is work, eat, and sleep. Oh yes, shopping's another thing. And Quidditch, of course."

"Such an interesting lifestyle…" James remarked sarcastically.

"Like yours is better?" Lily said, cocking her head. "I don't think so Mr. Potter."

"Well, it is," James said. "I also work, play pranks, eat, sleep, and play Quidditch. Oh yes, I watch the telly too."

"Ah, you're muggle born?"

"No, but my best friend is a half," James explained. "Quite a great invention, if you ask me."

"Truly," Lily agreed. "So, where to?"

"I have no clue," James said, scratching his head. "How about my place? We can watch the telly, if you want."

"Sounds great to me," Lily shrugged. He looked so cute scratching his head!

James let Lily climb onto his broom and them he climbed onto it himself. Wrapping his arms around Lily's petite waist, he kicked off into the night sky.

"Hm," Lily commented. "And you said I was the one with the interesting lifestyle?" Lily raised her eyebrow, looking at James' apartment.

"I know it's not exactly organized," James said, blushing a bit at his messiness. "You really can't help it if you live with 2 other guys."

Lily sighed. "Why must all the cute ones be slobs?"

"So you're calling me cute?" James grinned.

"Maybe," Lily teased. "Where's the telly you promised me?"

James pointed to a corner of the room. A rusty little television sat on a few hardcover books.

"Nice stand," Lily smiled.

"One of a kind," James replied, walking over to turn it on. A cartoon was playing.

"Aww, I love cartoons!" Lily exclaimed, settling into his couch, intently watching it.

James smiled. "Excuse me, won't you? I'm going to change out of these clothes."

"Sure," Lily replied absentmindedly, staring at the television.

A/N: Ugh! I didn't know how to end this chapter. I'm sorry for making it shorter than usual. I don't want it to much like the movie / If anyone would like to make any suggestions or anything, please email me or review.

I hope you liked this chapter, I think I could've done better. When James meets Lily, I suggest you listen to **Jay-Z – Excuse Me ****Miss**. I was listening to that song :) And I put some of the lyrics in the very beginning.

Love Always, Angeline


	5. Sparks Fly

**How to Lose a Wizard in 10 Days**

_Chapter Five – __Sparks__ Fly_

James came back into the living room, wearing a white t-shirt and flannel plaid pants. He grinned at the sight of Lily, staring at his television. James wondered how such a little thing sitting on dusty books would give such entertainment to Lily. She was beautiful, sexy, interesting… they also had a lot in common. Making her fall in love with him was going to be easier than baking a cake. Well, James had difficulty with baking, but you get what he means.

James cleared his throat, to get Lily's attention. Nothing happened. He cleared his throat louder. Again, nothing happened. James rolled his eyes. 'Oh please,' He thought. He looked around, seeing what he could use to grab her attention. He found a stuffed toy snitch, which was probably Sirius'. He threw it at her and James got Lily's attention.

"Hey!" Lily exclaimed, picking up the snitch. "You don't have to chuck poor little stuffed toys at me, you know."

"I tried clearing my throat twice, but nothing happened," James explained sweetly, settling on the couch with her.

Lily grinned. "Sorry, I don't get to watch the telly too much. Evil room mates."

"Tell me about it," James muttered.

"So, do you bring all the girls you meet the first night back to your flat?" Lily teased. "Or do you just like me better?"

"Heh heh," James chuckled. "Naw, I just like you better." He winked at her and he stared into Lily's eyes and removed a lock of her hair from those bright green eyes.

For a very rare moment, Lily's eyes peeled away from the telly and locked with James' eyes. 'Wow… those brown eyes… they look… delicious,' She thought to herself, exhilaratingly. The breathing of both of them had increased drastically and before they knew what was happening, their lips were locked and they were making out fiercely on James' couch. It seemed like hours before they parted.

"Wow," Lily breathed. Her head was spinning… she'd never kissed that hard in her life. Not since Hogwarts.

"Damn right," James said, fixing his glasses and wiping off the fog. He ran his hand through his hair. 'I so have her,' He thought smugly.

'This sort of sucks that I have to be ditzy to such a nice guy,' Lily thought guiltily. 'Ah well.'

"Don't you think we're going to fast?" Lily asked, unsure.

"We can go whatever pace you want, baby," James replied smoothly. He had her eating out of his hand!

Lily melted. "Aww… thanks."

"Hey," James replied. "I'm just being a gentleman."

Lily hugged him. "I had a great time tonight."

"Meet a girl, bring her back to my place, watch a bit of the telly, and make out like mad?" James mused. He nodded. "Yeah, pretty good date tonight."

Lily laughed. "Oh please. I've had worse."

"Oh really?" James arched his eyebrow. "Would you like to share more of you with me on our next date?"

"Oh, so there's going to be another date, huh?" Lily grinned.

"Lè Chantè, say about 7, tomorrow night?" James suggested.

"I'd love to," Lily whispered, giving James a tight hug.

James stroked her hair and whispered in her ear, "I hope we have something like this next time we meet."

"Me too," Lily said. "Bye now." She apparated back to her flat.

- -

"You whore!" Arabella exclaimed as Lily got back. "It's already 1 in the morning!"

"Wow, time passes by fast," Lily murmured.

"So…" Katie said. "How was it! Spill it all!"

Lily grinned excitedly. "Like **oh my gosh** he is so cute! But he's such a slob. I swear, I couldn't see the floor in his apartment, so basically, I just kept to myself."

Arabella sighed. "We know he's cute – why do all the cute ones have to be slobs!"

"I know!" Lily exclaimed. "That's what I said out loud to him and he just grinned and remarked, 'You think I'm cute?'. Gosh, this is going to be so perfect for the article!"

"This really sucks," Arabella replied disappointedly. "Why can't this be real life? It'd be so nice for you to have a boyfriend, Lils. You sounded so excited."

"Yeah, I know," Katie agreed. "Don't fall for him. You know he's only for an article."

"Oh, you guys!" Lily laughed. "I'm not falling for him, I barely know the guy. I don't need a boyfriend in real life or anything, jeez. But what I did manage to do is to snag a second date at Lè Chantè."

"Wow," Katie breathed. "He must be rich. Lè Chantè is so expensive… and is he French?"

"I haven't heard of that place," Lily said thoughtfully. "I dunno about the rich or expensive thing, but I'm pretty sure he isn't French. I mean, his last name is Potter. He's probably English, like us."

"You haven't heard of Lè Chantè!" Katie bursted out, shocked. The tone of her voice slowly turned into melancholy. "Frank had made reservations for us there to eat dinner, but we broke up." Katie tried to keep the tears in.

Arabella and Lily patted her back.

"There, there…" Arabella cooed. "Remember? We don't need guys. Frank's an ass for dumping you."

"I know," Lily replied. "**Total** ass. That's why I'm writing this article. To show your mistakes, even though you're a great person."

"Thanks, guys," Katie replied, sniffing.

"Your welcome," Arabella grinned. "Anyways, what else happened, Lil?"

"Okay, we made out like mad on his couch," Lily grinned. "And I got the second date and left."

Arabella slapped Lily's arm. "You **dog**."

Lily laughed and stuck out her tongue. "Don't hate me because I'm just too beautiful for you!"

"What are you talking about!" Arabella giggled.

- -

"Hey, so what happened at the meeting?" Sirius said, coming home with the smell of booze on his breath. His shirt was messed up, his hair tousled, and a drunk look on his dark face.

"I'm surprised you still remember," James muttered. Ever since Lily left, he was brushing up on those old James Potter dating charms and waiting for Sirius to come home.

"Just because I'm drunk, doesn't mean I don't remember important things," Sirius said slowly, his words slurring together.

James rolled his eyes. "Right."

Sirius staggered in, trying to raise his hand in protest. He fell to the floor.

"God, you're trashed," James muttered. He dragged Sirius onto the couch which was his old position. He went to get a blanket and threw it on Sirius's body.

"That should take care of it," James said to himself. He walked to Remus' room, hoping he was awake.

Well, James's hopes went down when he saw Remus sleeping like a baby on his bed, hugging the blankets close to his chest. James sighed and closed the door. He returned to his own bed and decided to explain about the meeting and the 'date' tomorrow when they were actually awake.

- -

Sirius looked around and his vision was still a bit woozy.

"What happened," He muttered to himself. Flashbacks of last night came back to him. He went to the Leaky Cauldron and got bloody drunk. James was going to have another fit. Again. Sirius groaned in aggravation. Today was… Tuesday! Holy shit! He jumped up as fast as his body would respond and ran to his closet.

James walked in the room and sighed in relief when he saw Sirius up and about. "Thank god you're up," James replied. "You know, you shouldn't really get drunk that much."

"Gee, thanks," Sirius replied groggily. "I'll be sure to keep that in mind when I'm drowning in beer."

James smiled dryly. "Glad you'll keep that in mind."

"No problem," Sirius said, stretching. "So, what happened in the meeting?"

"Wow," James replied in a shocked tone. "I'm shocked you still remember."

Sirius gave James a look.

"Okay, okay," James said. "We were talking about the diamond account and the conversation led somewhere and we made a bet."

"Ooh, I like bets," Sirius said, getting interested.

"I like this one, too," James grinned. "It's as easy as hell. They chose a girl in the Leaky Cauldron for me. Wow, she's fucking sexy. I have to make her fall in love with me in 10 days and if I do, then I get to be in charge of this account. Pretty damn easy, eh?"

"Aren't you getting a little ahead of yourself?" Sirius asked. "I mean, sure you're great with the women, Prongs, but… 10 days to make one fall in love with you? Is she the typical blonde stereotype?"

"Quite the opposite," James replied. "She's a red-head with the most brilliant emerald eyes."

"Damn it," Sirius swore. "It looks like we'll never get to work on this account."

"Watch your language, Padfoot," James warned. "What do you mean we'll never get to work on this account? Jeez, you sure have faith in me. Anyways, it'll be easier than eating pie. I just work the old Potter charm and she'll be falling like _that_."

"How can you be so sure of yourself!" Sirius laughed. "I don't think any female is that thick!"

"Because I am James Potter," James replied, patting off imaginary dust. "Of course women aren't thick. They're lovely creatures that'd line up any day just for a date with me, James Potter."

Sirius shook his head. "I dunno what happened to your ego, but it's definitely pushing mine out of this whole apartment."

James laughed. "Oh please. Why does everyone think I'm cocky? Can't people handle some confidence from a chap?"

"Not if the confidence gets a little overboard, hmm?" Sirius replied. "I mean, you never know if she's going to be using you or not and she sounds perfectly wonderful. Don't you feel guilty for using her?"

"Well, of course I do," James sighed. "But not everything in life's fair, right? I mean, if it was, maybe Chris would've let me work on an account months ago and not hand it to those two sluts."

"Yeah, you're right," Sirius replied. "Just be nice, I guess… Good luck."

"I don't need it," James grinned.

"Of course you do," Sirius rolled his eyes. "That damn cockiness of yours is coming back again."

"Oh, you know you love it," James winked.

"Oh god! Are you flirting with me!" Sirius wailed. "JAMES IS GAY!"

James laughed and glared. "Shut. Up."

- -

A/N: Oh god, you guys are wonderful! Sticking and baring with me for all this time! … _Wow_! That was the best chapter I've ever written. Well, everything flowed so easily. I love when that flow happens. Hehe. Review! This was a longer chapter than the others.

Love always, Angeline


	6. The Second Date

**How to Lose a Wizard in 10 Days**

_Chapter Six – The Second Date_

Lily didn't know why she was so nervous for this date. Maybe it was the outfit. It was a lovely shade of white. The fabric was made of silk and showed each curve in Lily's outfit, without being too revealing at the same time. Of course, you couldn't reveal _too_ much. You had to leave the guy guessing. She had also picked out a matching bag and shoes, too, of course. She never thought the effect of using little makeup would make it turn out gorgeous. 'Working for a beauty magazine** does** pay off I guess,' Lily smiled to herself.. With one last look and a deep breath, she went outside in the hall, where Katie and Arabella were waiting.

"Wow…" Katie said, amazed. "Lily, you look gorgeous!"

"Ditto," Arabella nodded, giving Lily a thumbs up. "When James sees you, I wouldn't be surprised if his mouth hits the floor." Arabella winked.

Lily smiled. "Thanks, guys. Haha… I've already planned a few things I could do to torture him tonight."

"Oh, really?" Arabella said, giving Lily a look and raising her eyebrows.

Lily giggled and pushed Arabella jokingly. "God, Bell! Aren't we being the little pervert tonight?"

Arabella laughed. "Oh, you know what I mean…"

Lily rolled her eyes. "Of course I do. Anyways, I think it'd be too fast to say that I love him tonight, plus I have all this great stuff planned.

"Oh, I get it!" Arabella grinned. "Hm, yeah, I guess you should start tonight so he could see how horrible you **really **are."

"Me, horrible?" Lily blinked innocently. They all cracked up.

"Anyways," Lily sighed. "I'm off now. Don't miss me too much."

- -

"Damn, Prongs," Sirius said, stretching. "How the hell are you going to get her to fall in love with you? Tonight is the second night! You better do something awesome."

"Stop panicking, Sirius," James replied, annoyed. "When have I ever let you down?"

Sirius began ticking off events off his fingers.

"Shut up," James grinned. "What I meant was how could I ever fail with the **ladies**? That's actually something I'm good at."

"For once, I actually agree," Remus nodded. "And I already know that James knows that he must do a kick-ass job on this date… _or else_."

"Damn, I don't want to know what the 'or else' is," James muttered.

"Stop swearing, James!" Sirius exclaimed, appalled. "Your mother would be ashamed!"

"You're one to speak."

"What **are** you talking about? Innocent ol' me?" Sirius put a finger on his chin and an innocent look on his face.

"Haha, quit it." James said. "So, I'm taking her out to Lè Chantè… should I go with a preppy look or casual?"

"Expensive," Remus noticed.

"Money does come in handy sometimes," James grinned.

"Wow, if I wasn't straight, I'd definitely date you," Sirius winked. "Or am I?" He hinted suggestively to James.

"Ew, that's disgusting. And you were calling **me** gay." James scoffed.

"I didn't mean it, _honey_," Sirius said, batting his short eyelashes and trying to look cute… but failing miserably.

"Cut it out, you two," Remus's stern voice interrupted their argument. "It's like I'm living with two-year olds! I feel like a mom."

James laughed. "I'm insulted, Moony. You know mentally that I'm a 8 year old! A 2 year old doesn't know sh-"

"HOKAY!" Sirius exclaimed. "Enough with the swearing. You'll never win her over, you foul-mouthed as-"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa…" James replied. "Hold up! You're the one that was about to say the… _a-word_!"

"The a-word!" Sirius exclaimed. "What are we? 5th graders!"

"Like I said before," James smiled proudly. "We are **mentally** 5th graders."

"Speak for yourself," Sirius scoffed. "Anyways, I think you should go for the preppy look. The hunky look always wins the girls over."

"Yeah, the **blonde** girls," James said. "What about red-heads? I think this is, like, the first time I've dated one."

"Amazing," Sirius said. He counted his fingers and looked like he was… thinking! "Come to think of it, I haven't dated a lot of red-heads either. They do have a reputation of being fiery bitches, of course."

"Well, this one is different," James said, finally deciding on wearing a khaki-colored pair of nice cut trousers and settling on a pale blue rugby shirt.

"Sure." Sirius said, waving the matter off quickly. "Nice choice. Bring her some flowers… that **definitely** charms all the girls."

"Yeah, I should bring her Lilies!" James said excitedly.

"Wow, so you do know how to use your brain," Sirius retorted.

"James sounds excited about his date toni-ight!" Remus teased.

"Hey, if I win her over, we all get to pitch in for the biggest account our company has ever handled! Bear with me guys, please."

"True," Sirius muttered.

Remus agreed.

- -

"Wow…Lily," James breathed. "You look…gorgeous tonight." James was waiting for Lily in front of Lè Chantè for a few minutes. She looked absolutely gorgeous when she showed up.

"Not too shabby, either, James," Lily grinned.

"Oh!" James said, suddenly getting aware of the situation. He handed her the bouquet of white and light-pink lilies he had picked up. They were wrapped in plastic with a clean, white ribbon. "These are for you." Suddenly, James felt very, very shy.

"Ohh, thank you!" Lily exclaimed loudly. "I **love** them!" She put her nose in the bouquet of flowers and inhaled deeply. A big smile was plastered over her face.

James smiled and felt glad. Inside, he felt very smug because he knew he was going to win the bet, hands down.

"Shall we go in?" He opened the door and gestured inside.

"Thank you," Lily smiled and walked in.

- -

"Monsieur, what will you be ordering tonight?" An elegantly dressed waiter waited patiently for James to order.

"I will start off with the escargots and pommes frites, then the poissons cuits au four, and finish off with crême glacée de mangue and gâteau au fromage de chocolat. Oh, and a martini, please. Thanks, Pierre." James finished eloquently as he handed the waiter the menu. He frequently dined at Lè Chantè, so ordering was no big problem for him.

"Ummm…" Lily said, looking unsure at the menu and was worried about embarrassing herself. However, James found her very cute when her face was scrunched up like that.

"I will have the salade de poulet, thank you very much," Lily smiled and handed the waiter the menu.

"And will madam have anything to drink?" The waiter asked.

"Water will be fine," Lily said. She knew ordering a small salad and water was the best way of pissing guys off… especially if you ate from their food.

"So, what do you think of it so far?" James asked.

"Very, uhh.. French," Lily grinned. "Haha… I didn't know you spoke French so well."

"It seems like it, huh?" James said, grinning. "I don't really, unless you think "speaking French well" means knowing all the names of the French food. I just come here often to eat."

"Wow, rich and handsome," Lily teased. "This one just might be a keeper."

"Well, then bringing you here tonight to this classy restaurant was definitely the right choice, huh?" James smiled.

"Definitely. Point one for James," Lily agreed.

"So, Madame Lil-lee," James said, doing his perfect French accent. "How 'ahs your day?"

"It 'ahs 'ahunderful, Jae-mee," Lily replied, using _her_ best French accent. "Damn, I suck at this French accent thing. Oh well." Before Lily could continue, the food came.

"Wow, fast service," Lily noted.

"Another point for James," James replied, grinning.

"And I'm actually enjoying myself, too!" Lily replied. "One more point."

Lily picked at her salad. 'Ugh, how could girls eat this crap? It's basically leaves and some chicken meat.' She groaned to herself mentally. She stared at James' food. She was practically drooling. James started off with appetizers of French Fries and Snails… 'Disgusting but still better than any salad,' Lily thought. Time to put her plan into action!

Lily reached over and grabbed 5 of James' fries and ate them. "Wow, these are **so** good!" She exclaimed. "Got any ketchup?"

"Ketchup?" James asked, giving Lily a weird look.

"I'm Muggle-Born," Lily explained. "Ketchup is a sauce made from tomatoes to go make French Fries taste awesome."

"I know what ketchup is," James replied. "Just interesting you seem so smart."

"Thanks," Lily replied, grabbing more of James' fries.

'Why does she keep eating my fries?' James thought to himself, annoyed. 'If she wanted fries so much, she should've ordered fries herself and not some stupid salad.'

Lily could see by James' face that he was slowly getting mad. Lily smiled. 'My plan is working!' She thought merrily to herself.

- -

Author's Note: Isn't the song in the beginning cute? It's Blink 182 – First Date ).


	7. Personalities Revealed …Slowly

**How to Lose a Wizard in 10 Days**

_Chapter Seven – Personalities Revealed (…Slowly)_

By the end of the night, James was getting more and more aggravated. He bit his tongue, clenched his fists together, and even grinded his teeth together to cope with the fact that this beautiful, gorgeous woman he was dating was being the biggest pain in his arse. He knew he should've been more understanding with the whole fry ordeal, but he absolutely **loathed** it when women would just order a glass of water and a salad and then eat _his_ food, for crying out loud!

By the end of the meal, Lily's salad was untouched while most of James's food was devoured by Lily.

"God, James," Lily said, looking quite pleased and happy. "That was **_so _**delicious. Thank you for taking me here tonight!"

_Bloody fucking wench taking my bloody food…_ "Your welcome, Lily," James managed to muster up a smile. "It was definitely my pleasure." He got up and held out his hand to help Lily get up.

"Very gentleman-like," Lily commented while taking his hand. "Another point for Mister Potter."

James grinned. "Thanks m'lady." He escorted her outside.

"So…this was fun," Lily said, twirling with a strand of her fiery-red hair.

"Indeed it was," James replied. He reached into his coat pocket and pulled out a pair of tickets. "Tickets."

"Tickets?" Lily asked. She was praying they were Quidditch tickets.

"Tickets to tomorrow night's Quidditch game," James explained and shot her a grin. "The Wimbourne Wasps vs. the Appleby Arrows – it's at 7 o' clock."

"Oh my gosh!" Lily squealed in her highest voice. "I've been wanting those tickets _FOREVER_! Thank you James!" She gave him a peck on the cheek.

"Wow, tickets to a Quidditch game and I get a peck on the cheek? How lovely," James replied. "I wonder how I shall top myself next time…"

"Well, worry about that later," Lily said. "I'm **so** excited! This is absolutely bloody brilliant. Thank you, James… thank you!"

"No problem," James said looking quite chuffed. She was _so_ falling for him! Maybe he should get her tickets to the World Cup. He chuckled. She'd probably marry him for that.

"What's so funny?" Lily asked, hearing James's low chuckle.

"Oh, nothing," James said quickly. Too quickly.

"Who is she?" Lily narrowed her eyes. It was too perfect timing for Lily to test out her new theory.

"She? Who's she?" James said, looking confused.

"Whatever, James!" Lily said, looking as if she was about to cry. "You can't just give me these great Quidditch tickets to make up for you cheating on me already! What is it about me, James? Have I gotten fat? What? WHAT IS IT ABOUT ME THAT YOU DON'T LIKE? IS IT THE FACT I HAVE GREEN EYES AND RED HAIR? IS IT?" Lily was quite actress.

"Whoa," James said. "Calm down, Lily. Calm down. For starters, I'm not cheating on you. Who would cheat on you? You're like the perfect woman. The only thing I don't like about you is that you're way too perfect. I don't like the fact you have green eyes and red hair, I **love** the fact that you do. You're so different from the other girls. I would never change a **thing** about you."

Lily was shocked. She didn't know that James could handle her outburst _that_ well. Great, now she had to retaliate. "Thanks honey," She replied sweetly, giving him a kiss on the cheek. "Now I'm definitely reassured."

"You're welcome," James grinned back. "Now don't go getting those silly ideas in your head."

"I won't, I promise," Lily replied solemnly. "Owl me!" She apparated back her flat with a _Pop!_

- - - - -

"Ew, God, what did I just **say**?" Lily questioned herself in a disgusted tone. She shook off that feeling. "At least I'm getting paid for this." She groaned. Doing this was harder than she had expected. Plus now she had to top herself. Lily dug out her keys from within her bag and opened the apartment door.

"Hey lovely," Arabella greeted her. "Where have you been? I haven't seen you for like…days. I guess things are going well with James, huh?" Arabella winked.

"Yeah, things are going pretty well. Pretty soon I'm going to have this guy running for his life." Lily grinned and faked a sigh. "I almost feel bad."

Arabella laughed. "So evil," She commented.

"Yeah, but it's getting harder and harder to outdo myself," Lily sighed, kicking off her shoes and dumping her stuff on the couch. She sat down next to Arabella.

"Ooh, you should make him a mix tape," Arabella suggested. "With all of **your** songs." She grinned with that evil look shining through her eyes.

"Our songs? We've only known each other for like- _oh_… I see what you mean." Lily grinned. "I like it. No, wait – I **_love_** it."

"I'll conjure it up for you," Arabella offered. "So you have extra time to choose what to wear to the Quidditch game – not like you'd have any trouble."

"Yeah, I love Quidditch Games!" Lily exclaimed excitedly. "Thanks for making the mix tape, Bell."

"You're welcome," Arabella shrugged. "It's not like I have anything better to do."

Lily laughed. "So true."

"Shut up," Arabella glared, furrowing her brows together. "Lana gave me the day off to… 'recuperate' or whatever."

"She's still pissed about that article you wrote, huh?" Lily asked, raising an eyebrow. "Totally unfair."

"Tell me about it," Arabella sighed, rubbing her temples. "How the hell would I know that witch would sue? She let me interview her! Wench! Anyways, it's all right. _Hopefully_, Lana will forget and actually tolerate the fact that I work under her again."

"Mm, hopefully," Lily agreed, nodding her head. "Don't worry, you'll be fine."

Arabella smiled. "Go off, choose something to wear! I'm getting to work on that mix tape." Arabella shooed Lily away.

Lily laughed heartily. "Alright, alright!"

- - - - -

The mix tape was a success. So was the outfit Lily picked. Muggle clothes were really nice. Lily decided that she'd wear them more often. She tied up her long, red hair into a high ponytail. She let tendrils of her bangs hang in her face. Lily wore a red tank top (the same shade as her hair) with jeans and some sneakers to match. The result turned out nicely. When she had apparated in front of the stadium at exactly 7 o' clock, James wasn't there and Lily felt a bit uneasy. What if he'd stood her up? It'd be a nice twist on her article, but she really wanted to watch the game. Which she couldn't, since James had her ticket.

"Lily!" A voice yelled through the crowds.

Lily turned around and smiled. It was James… with a bouquet of red roses! Aww, what a charmer!

"I suppose these are for me?" Lily grinned, taking the roses.

"You suppose right," James replied, smiling. "Do you like them?"

Lily inhaled deeply, taking in the sweet smell of her red roses. "I love them," she breathed. "They're beautiful… simply beautiful."

"Not as beautiful as you," James murmured as he leaned in and gave Lily a peck on the cheek. '_My God, I'm as smooth as butter_,' James thought to himself smugly. '_I.__ Am. So.__ Good._'

The kiss seemed to have some electricity…at least, that's how Lily felt. She felt shy, embarrassed, giddy, and happy at all the same time. Let's just say she was a sucker for romance.

"I knew you'd like it." James grinned. "C'mon, let's go in and enjoy the game." He held his hand out for Lily to hold.

Lily smiled. "Oh, before we go in… I just want to give you something… I made it myself," she added shyly. She pulled the mix tape out of her pocket. She had taped a piece of paper on it that read 'James and Lily Forever!'

"What is it?" James asked, examining it. Was this some sort of Muggle thing? If so, he'd have to ask Sirius about it.

"It's a mix tape," Lily replied flatly. All that trouble gone to waste! He didn't even know what it was!

"Mix tape?" James asked curiously. "What in Merlin's beard is that?"

"It's a tape…of all our songs," Lily replied dreamily. "If you put it in something called a "stereo", you can listen to it."

"Oh," James said. "…Thanks."

"You don't like it?" Lily asked, making her eyes big and blinking. She tried to look as if she was on the verge of tears. "But I worked so hard on it, James!" Inside, she was laughing so hard she could almost pee.

"N-no, I love it!" James replied nervously. "I really, _really_ do! Trust me." He shot her a grin, hoping it'd send her out of spastic mood.

"Really?" Lily said, her eyes brimming with tears. God, she was a wonderful actress. She could cry on cue.

"Yes, I truly do," James said, grabbing Lily's shoulder and giving them a reassuring squeeze. He leaned forward and kissed Lily's cheek quickly and grinned.

Lily smiled. "Aww… I love you, Jamesy Wamesy."

"You w-wh-?" James asked. He was shocked… did I mention horrified as well?

"Shh," Lily interrupted, putting her finger onto his lips. "Don't say a word; I know you feel the same way." She embraced him tightly, breathed in his scent and sighed happily.

James felt awkward and patted Lily's back. What else could the poor fellow do? He just had to play along…he returned her warm embrace and smiled.

"I can't wait for you to meet my father," Lily continued, trying to squeeze the living hell out of James. "You two are so alike… I just can't wait."

Okay, now James was seriously freaked out. But, hey – he _had _to win that bet… he just had to play along the best he could. "O-oh…really, now?" He asked nervously. "We're alike?"

"Yup," Lily replied, pulling away from the embrace and giving James a big smile. "He loves French food, Quidditch, and…yeah. You both just act the same – you always remind me of him. His name is Harry, by the way. He's got glasses like you, too!"

"How weird," James mused. "My middle name is Harry."

"Hmm, what a cool coincidence," Lily gushed. "Gosh, that makes you two have even _more_ in common!"

"Game starts in 5 minutes!" A loud voice boomed throughout the stadium. "Get into your seats now!"

"Oh, damn, we better hurry," James muttered, grabbing Lily's hand and running to the ticket collector.

'_Damn, this feels nice_,' Lily thought to herself. But instantly, she shrugged the feeling off. She couldn't like this guy!

- - - - -

"God, that was a great game!" Lily exclaimed as she walked out of the stadium and onto the sidewalk. Her heart was beating fast from all the action she had just endured. The Wimbourne Wasps were losing a great deal, 50 – 140 with the Appleby Arrows in the lead. Then, during the last minute, when the Arrows scored 150, the Seeker from the Wasps caught the snitch.

James laughed. "For once, I'd have to agree. But I still think the Appleby Arrows should've won."

"No way," Lily argued, putting her hands up in protest. "The Wimbourne Wasps all the way."

"But they suck," James argued. "They won out of pure luck."

"Or perhaps pure skill," Lily suggested.

He rolled his eyes. "Sure, keep dreaming, Evans," He replied dryly.

"Evans?" Lily mocked him. "All right, _Potter_." She laughed at him.

He smiled at her. His opinion of her kept changing. One minute, she was this vivacious, sexy, beautiful woman… then all of a sudden, she becomes clingy, needy, and desperate – it was getting _really_ annoying.

"I'm so glad I spent tonight watching this game with you," Lily gazed lovingly at James. "It was wonderful."

"I know," James replied. "So, this is what…our 3rd date now?"

"Yup," Lily replied perkily, tapping James lightly on the nose. "So glad you remembered. Call me tomorrow?"

"Using one of those muggle fellytones?" James asked, laughing. "No thanks, I've spent about a billion years trying to work those things – they don't work for me, damn things."

"Actually, it's telephone," Lily corrected, putting her hand over her mouth to stifle a laugh. "And, it's not hard to set up. It's actually quite easy and it's a lovely muggle machine."

"At Hogwarts, I practically _failed_ Muggle Studies," James laughed, putting his hands into his pockets and kicking a few rocks on the sidewalk.

"Seriously? Damn, you suck," Lily teased. "Hey, I went to Hogwarts too."

"Oh, really? How cool," James replied. "You're two years younger than me, though."

"Don't tease me about it," Lily warned.

"Hey, I wasn't going to," James said, putting his hands up as if Lily were a cop.

"Good," Lily replied firmly. "I hate it when people tease me – no matter if it's about my age, my eyes, my hair…"

"I don't see anything wrong with your eyes, hair, _or_ age," James smiled. "They're all beautiful; just like you."

"Aww," Lily cooed. "You're so cute. But I have to run."

"All right," James said. "I'll owl you!"

"Good," Lily smiled. "I look forward to seeing how you're going to top this date with the next one."

"Oh God," James replied, burying his face into his hands. "Do you really expect me to top this date? How can you top a Quidditch game?"

"Use your imagination!" Lily smiled, waved, and apparated back to her flat.


	8. Our So Called Love is a Weed

**How to Lose a Wizard in 10 Days**

_Chapter 8 – Our So-Called "Love" is a Weed_

**Bz. Bz. Bz. **8:00 AM. Perfect.

Lily watched as her alarm clock rang for the very first time in her life. She was getting ready to surprise James with another one of her brilliantly, thought-out schemes. Early this morning, when she woke up at 5 AM (due to some stupid dog barking wildly outside like a bloody car alarm), she tried transfiguring one of her old quills into a lovely Rose plant. Unfortunately, this plan backfired and instead, she got a disgusting-looking weed. Lightning struck, and a beautiful plan was born.

"You are my star," Lily whispered to the feeble weed. She hummed a merry tune and got ready to visit James at his workplace. Oh what a perfect girlfriend she was. She went and fetched some coffee to be more awake, after all a day of torturing lay ahead of her.

"Someone looks nice this morning," Arabella commented with a smile when she saw Lily stroll in. "But lose the plant, seriously."

"That's a plant?" Katie asked, looking intrigued. "I thought it was like wire, wound up or something…"

"Thanks, guys," Lily rolled her eyes. "Result of my wonderful transfiguration. Lovely, isn't it?"

"Gorgeous," Arabella replied, clapping. "Absolutely fantastically gorgeous. Did I mention how much I envy you in Transfiguration?" Arabella laughed.

"Agreed," Katie replied, nodding her head.

Lily bowed. "Thank you."

"So what's the plant for?" Arabella asked, while eating cereal.

"It's actually a weed, calling it a plant would to make it sound stronger than this limp thing," Lily said, touching it gently. A piece of it fell off. "Uh, yeah. It's really… not strong."

"A weed? Why do you need a _weed_, for God's sake?" Katie asked.

"It's a present for James," Lily replied simply. "It's our Love… plant."

"Love Weed?" Arabella asked, raising an eyebrow. "How catchy."

"That thing looks like it's going to die," Katie commented. "Why don't you use another plant that's more stable like… a fern?"

"That's perfect!" Lily exclaimed. "It grows really long and everywhere, just like our _love_. Thanks Katie." She cackled.

"Your welcome," She smiled. "But don't ever cackle again. That was sure as hell one of the most freakiest thing ever."

Lily rolled her eyes and smiled. "I know you love it."

"I'll transfigure it," Arabella suggested, lightening up. "It's been ages since I've transfigured anything. Let me whip out my wand."

"Sure," Lily replied carelessly and sauntered over to the kitchen, leaving the plant on the table. "Do we have anything besides cereal and milk?"

"No," Katie replied.

"We have to go grocery shopping soon," Lily said, making a mental note.

"Back with my wand!" Arabella exclaimed, rushing back, holding up her wand in triumph.

"Awesome," Lily replied, munching on Cheerios. "Transfigure it, dear."

Arabella did a few motions with her wrist and muttered, "_Rortify_!"

The weed immediately transformed into a healthy-looking, green fern.

Arabella beamed. "And _that_ is how it's done."

"Thanks, Bell!" Lily exclaimed, giving her a hug. She motioned for Katie to join in.

And she did.

- - - - -

"Jamesie-poo!" Lily cooed. "Open this door, sweetie! I have a surprise for you!"

James groaned. What was it? A Saturday morning? No. Oh shit, it's Thursday! He rubbed his eyes sleepily and treaded slowly to the door to answer it.

"Lily," He said flatly. "Hi."

"Hello, you!" Lily replied bouncily, holding the fern in a basket with other accessories and letting herself in immediately.

"What a nice surprise…" James replied dully, shutting the door behind him. "What brings you here?"

Lily sniggered. "Nice boxers. Flying ducks, how classic."

James blushed. "Don't judge me on my underwear; at least I'm not wearing extra small tight ones that cling to my bottom... although I think that would be a rather _generous_ image and offer for you, m'dear." He grinned.

"No thanks, and thank **god **you don't!" Lily replied, laughing. He really could be quite the charmer… it was a shame Lily had to do what she had to do to him. "Anyways, I thought I'd drop by asking what you want to do for today. Oh! And I brought something very, _very_ special…"

"Dare I ask what it is?" James asked, fogging up his glasses and wiping them so he'd have clearer vision.

"It's our Love Fern!" Lily exclaimed happily, shoving the basket to James. "It's still a baby… just like our relationship." She said, batting her eyes, trying to look innocent while desperate at the same time.

"…what?" James asked. Bewilderment spread to all parts of his face. "A _fern_? This looks like a … weed. But it's wonderful, darling! Absolutely wonderful…"

"What?" Lily asked innocently. "You don't like it?"

"No no no!" James exclaimed. "I love it… but what's the point of a _fern_?"

"I think it's fun," Lily shrugged. "Plus, it's like our relationship… it's just still a baby. Don't you just find that the littlest bit cute?"

"Of course I do," James replied weakly, feeling cramped.

"I also brought a box of my stuff over," Lily said. "I mean, now that we're in a relationship – I think I should leave some things here in your flat… since I'll be spending more time here." She smiled.

"S-sure," James stuttered slowly, and tried to take in all this information.

"I hope you don't mind, but I thought – why should you mind! I mean, we are boyfriend and girlfriend, right?" Lily asked, smiling again.

"I d-don't mind," James said, trying to be nonchalant and shrugging it off. "It's okay."

"Aww, you're so good to me, Jamesie," Lily said, in a baby voice. She started setting her stuff up. They were mostly pink, frilly things. Oh, and of course feminine products like pads and tampons. That was _definitely_ a must. No matter how macho James made himself seem, _no man_ could be okay with feminine products.

James sighed in frustration, wondering if he should go through with the bet or to just call it quits. Lily Evans was driving him nuts – and this time, he could _not_ handle it.

"Lily, it's already 9:30 and I have to get to work in half an hour," James said, trying to get her to leave. "Chris would kill me if I was late."

"Aww, okay," Lily replied, sounding sad. "I'll miss you, Jamesie-Wamesie!"

"I'll miss you, too, my Lily-lily," James said, cooing back. Two could play this game. He walked her to the door.

"Owl me later if we're going to do anything!" Lily said, smiling. "Bye.. I'll miss you, boo!"

"I will!" James said, opening the door.

"Byee… Remember! Owl me!" Lily yelled, trying to look desperate.

James slammed the door and felt like crying. What had he done? This Lily Evans… absolutely infuriating and was it really worth it _just_ for one account? He sighed.

- - - - -

"Guys, I seriously can't take this anymore," James said, bringing his fist to the table.

"Come _on_, James," Sirius replied exasperatedly. "It's not like we're asking you to climb something like Mt. Everest. Just date her. You have like, what? 6 days left? Come on, _be a man_!"

"A man?" James scoffed. "Pfft, I don't think _any_ man could handle this. She's fucking nuts, seriously! She gave me a damn _Love fern_. She said all this rubbish about it being symbolic to our relationship. How could she compare _love_ to a weed!"

"Love?" Remus asked, raising an eyebrow amusedly. "Since when was this undying hate turned magically into love?"

"You know what I mean!" James replied and rolled his eyes. "Not love but how could she compare our 'relationship' to a weed? Something that like attaches itself on walls and just… _grows_?"

Sirius snorted. "Maybe she thinks the love both of _you_ share is like that."

James took a swig of butterbeer. "She's fuckin' psychotic."

"Don't need to tell me _that_ twice," Sirius nodded, agreeing.

"I think she's pleasant," Remus said simply.

"Oh, do shut _up_, Moony," James implored sarcastically.

"But, seriously," Sirius said, "I hate it when girls get like this. I mean, everything's like a smooth ride until _bam!_ something hits and they're PMS-ing like crazy. I really don't get women and if any man ever does, I will worship him until the day I die, I swear."

"Amen to that," James said.

Remus nodded in agreement.

They all leaned back, thinking about their past relationships with women. Some went wrong, some went right, and some didn't go anywhere at all.

Remus suddenly snorted with laughter.

"What?" James asked.

"A weed," Remus chortled softly, "I really can't believe she got you a weed."

James rolled his eyes. "Shut up," he muttered.

"Maybe this is why you're still single. Women think of your love as weedy," Remus suggested, trying to stifle his laughter.

"My love is fucking fantastic, thank you very much," James nodded brusquely. "You're just jealous _you_ won't get any of it."

"Quite the contrary, Mr. Potter," Remus replied dignified. "I'm actually glad and relieved I won't have to experience a taste of your weedy love."

James gritted his teeth. "I. Hate. Her."

"I. Love. Her." Sirius sighed happily. "She's really getting to you, huh?"

"Yeah."

"Bloody fantastic, she is."

"Padfoot?"

"Yes, Prongs, m'dear?"

"_Do_ shut up."

"Make me, peon."

"Tart."

"Prat."

"Idiot."

"Moron."

"Wanker."

"_Okay_," Remus interrupted, "Stop the petty name-calling. It's really so childish of you two. So, _anyways_, James… when she came over and brought the plant, did she say anything else?"

"She told me to owl her. Like I'm going to anymore," James scoffed. "She's crazy if she thinks I am."

"Then let her be crazy," Remus raised an eyebrow, "You _do_ want this account don't you? You have what, 5 or 6 more days left? That's less than 150 hours, Prongs! You'd spend half of that sleeping for Christ's sake! Just suck it up and _do_ it!"

"I agree, James," Sirius nodded, serious, "don't you want to show up whatstheirfaces? Think of the immense satisfaction and rubbing-it-in-their-face time we'll be getting. It'll be totally wicked."

"That is quite tempting," James said, nodding a bit, "Fine. I'll owl her. But what the fuck do I say? 'Lily, I love you for comparing our so called _love_ to a weed?'"

"It's a start," Remus said, shrugging.

"More like a dead end," James commented. "I can't write that. Something real and genuine."

"Plan another date," Sirius suggested.

"Oh _god_," James moaned. "Another few hours of torture."

"Which means another few hours of bragging and pounding Carolyn and Jessica's egos," Sirius quipped happily, feeling as if he'd already started.

Hesitation inhibited James at first, but then he was sure. "Fine, I'll do it. Rubbing it in Jessica and Carolyn's face better be as good as I'm expecting it to be." James shook his head. "I'm going to kill someone if it's not."

"With an attitude like that, I'm sure it'll feel freeing," Remus chuckled.

"More than freeing. More like bloody damn awesome!" Sirius cried happily. "Oh, god, I can't wait. Their expressions: priceless."

"I'm getting excited thinking about it, too," James confided, feeling jumpy. "Get me a piece of parchment! I'm going to write a love letter to my beloved Lily."

Remus hurried and grabbed a piece of paper.

James started to scribble his heart away… as if that was possible.

- - - - -

"God, I'm actually starting to feel sorry for him," Lily said, laughing at her own antics. "I compared our so-called _love_ to a weed."

"That was ingenious," Arabella commented, suppressing her sniggers.

It was Thursday morning, bright and shining in the _Teen Witch_ Offices. Lily had been talking about her triumphs this mornings with Arabella and Katie.

"So, my star, Lily, how's the brilliant article going?" A distinct voice asked curiously behind the girls.

"Absolutely lovely," Lily replied promptly, handing Lana a packet of papers. "My notes so far, including a scenario from this morning."

"Oh?" Lana asked, flipping through the pages. She mused and paused while she was thinking. "Love it, love it… Lily, if I was a person who laughed, I would, but can't have any frown more lines! But I have a feeling this article is going to be a smash. I'm loving all the words so far." She ran off and scurried away.

"Any _more_ frown lines? The woman's got enough than dirt!" Katie whispered, giggling.

Lily laughed, nodding. It _was_ true.

Lily smiled, pleased with her own achievement, nagging and bugging the hell out of James. She sighed with content. Doing this job was easier than baking a cake sometimes, and deep down, she knew it bothered her, wasting away her life doing something so easy.

But she would once she made enough money to financially support herself, she would do it her way. She would apply to be a journalist and write about ground-breaking stories and not about how to date some stupid wizard in 10 stupid days.

- - - - -

**A/N**: 1 year, 2 months. That's inexcusable. My writing interests have changed. I'm going to try my best to finish this story, which at this point I have NO idea how I'm going to do that, and maybe get started with other styles. I have _another_ story in mind, yes, I know, _another_ story… but thanks for sticking with me along for this ride. I hope you enjoy this chapter. I updated all the other chapters and took out the responses to reviewers because I will no longer be doing that. I appreciate all reviews but it's stupid to include it in the text of my story, you know? I think I might just make a separate livejournal for that because I truly appreciate each and every review and reviewer :)  
Love Always, Angeline


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